I found Feilding’s sister city, sister

Today’s post brought to you by: A coffee-fuelled writer

Grateful for: Kind people

Trying hard to accept: Need to rewrite posts due to unsolved tech hitch

What does this remind you of?

I now understand why Yafit struggled with the concept of ‘downtown’ Lafayette yesterday. In three words, it doesn’t exist.

Ever been to Feilding with its narrow old streets selling everything you don’t need and nothing you do? I’ve landed in the Acadian version.

After an hour walking on sloping verges through grass and mud (Because. There. Are. No. Footpaths. Did. I. Mention. That?) I finally found what I was looking for.

Except I didn’t. Because downtown Lafayette is the size of my bedroom with an invisible line that Lexi tells me not to cross if I want to stay alive.

Lexi is my waitress in Dwyer’s Café – one of the eateries I came to because Google reviews told me to, when I was sitting at my table in Wellington researching this trip down to the last shrimp poboy.

And what a darn good choice it was. Firstly it’s warm. Secondly it’s got wifi. Thirdly it’s got endless coffee, which is also warm. Most importantly it’s got Lexi, who has explained what a ‘plated lunch’ is, told me to forget finding a supermarket anywhere near here, and has been so welcoming that frankly I don’t want to leave. Wonder what the limit on coffee refills is.

(An aside – the woman next to me is munching her way through a serving of deep-fried onion rings the size of four calling birds, three French hens, two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree).

I know you’re on the edge of your seats itching to know what a plated lunch is. Well once you’ve had one you’ll never order off a menu again.

You go down the back of the café and for … SIX DOLLARS. Did you see that? SIX DOLLARS you get child’s (assuming your child is 7 ft tall and 250 pounds) portion of 1 meat (I chose cabbage rolls for your grandma and mom, Izabela), and 3 sides.

Child’s portion!!!

This morning I vowed to myself that after yesterday’s pigfest I’d only eat homemade low-calorie food today. Well the little hand has passed 12 and it’s afternoon now so all pre-noon vows are off.

A very quiet little nagging voice forced me to at least order token green stuff but could I pass the eggplant casserole? Could I ‘eck as like. If I ever lose my teeth I’m gonna live on eggplant casserole. It’s got a mushy white bread base and slow cooked eggplant and mildly spiced tomato sauce and it wraps you up and gives you a big warm carb-laden hug.

Yes, that’s another biscuit on my plate. No, I don’t care.

Ok I’ve been in Dwyer’s 2 hours – most of it on online chat with blog tech support woman. Better go face the soul music. Reckon it’ll take me all of 3 minutes to cover the rest of downtown.

4 hours, 3 coffees, and 15 degrees drop in temperature later.

It took me all of 30 seconds to cover the rest of downtown. Basically stumbled from one café to the next. Phone needed charging so Roasters Coffee it was. Killed an hour, surreptitiously ate two of my snacks, charged phone, and used wifi and nice bathroom all for $3.

Bad news readers. Inevitable tech hitches with blog site. I write stuff, I add a few prize-worthy photos, I hit save and get error message. Took me 2 hours last night to write and rewrite yesterday’s post. Tech support are “getting back to me” as is ASB bank re broken Visa card. Hickory BBQ Pigs. Might. Fly.

While I remember, some tips if you ever do similar trip:

Strike while the iron’s hot. Every time you go into a café or restaurant grab all the free sachets of relish, mustard, mayo, salt and pepper, margarine and jam, and cutlery and napkins you can cram in your pockets. You’ll thank me when you wake up on Greyhound and need to make a breakfast sandwich (yes, you need to have bought bread, obvs).

Always chose a café table next to a power point. Always carry your charger.

Always check for free wifi – if it’s locked ask staff member for password (if you don’t have a little girl lost from other side of world accent, fake one) or guess it.

The longest you can sit in a café on one cup of coffee while you charge your phone/write your blog is 3 hours. Longer if you’ve made instant friends with your waitress and shown her the picture you took of her on your blog site.

Ride the local bus. It costs $1 and you meet lovely people. If you’ve got white skin you’ll be a novelty for the first time in your life.

Drink filter coffee. It’s only $2 and you get as many refills as your heart can take. Espresso is for when you’re back home in a job.

Talk to anybody and everybody. They’ll make you feel less lonely, give you lots of advice and restore your faith in people. Particularly if you’ve ever lived in NZ where customer service staff seem to translate ‘customer’ as interruption to their texting/chatting/posing/resting.

You’re welcome.

So after I’d outstayed my Earl Grey at Roasters Coffee I went to the Rosa Parks Transportation Centre where you’d kind of expect to find a bus route map. Forget it. But what I did find was the nicest bus driver who basically took me (only passenger) on a door to door trip to the supermarket so I’d avoid waiting/having to cross 6 lane road. I seemed to make her day when I told her she was one of the nicest and most helpful people I’ve met here.

Rosa looking for a bus route map

The other one was Mike the transgender guy working at Panera Bread café where I’m writing this from, who was super duper friendly and chatty.

Ok it’s getting dark so better post this (it won’t work but can but try) and go buy groceries for the 1.5 day bus trip. Greyhound had better not do an Amtrak on me and fail to deliver the promised free wifi otherwise they too will be getting some ‘constructive feedback’.